This morning I was rejected by a boy at a bus stop.

(overexposed stalker photo I took of a couple in Vasastan park)

Or man I should say.  Young man.  Guy.  I recently had a (brief) exchange about the “boy/guy/man” label with my 20 something cousin who assured me that we still refer to them as “guys” until we become properly old.  This seems reasonable enough, as ‘boy’ sounds terribly young and ‘man’ sounds terribly…well, mature.  Not old, but definitely not these foppish dandies in their 20’s and 30’s who are hanging on to their shreds of childhood.  George Clooney is a man.  Zack Efron is a guy.  Justin Bieber is a boy.  Well that makes classification a lot easier.

It always trips me up when I read an article about a “man” or “woman” who is 19 or 20.  If you are younger than me, you do not get one of those labels.  (An even superior classification system.)

Right.  But as I was saying, I was rejected by said fellow at said location.  I was wearing eyeliner, a colorful belt, and green skinny trousers with my patched hippy purse containing trusty Canon 60D.  If that outfit doesn’t stave off rejection, I don’t know what will.  Our conversation went a little something like this:

Me: “I’m doing a project about being young in Stockholm.  Would you mind if I took your photo?”

Boy/Guy/Man: “Oh, no.  You can’t.”

Me: “OK.”

Boy/Guy/Man: “I don’t look very good today.”

Yep.  And I thought (shamefully) What a girly excuse.  Men generally don’t have good/bad appearance days.  See list:

Reasons why men don’t have good/bad appearance days

– They don’t wear makeup.

– They (usually) have short hair and don’t have to deal with styling/controlling, etc.

– Dirt makes them look manlier and sexier *

– So does getting lazy about shaving (five o’clock shadow?  yes, please)

– They don’t have to shave/bleach/etc. legs, arms, etc.

– They don’t have to worry about matching clothing to shoes to purses to scarves to socks to nose rings to hair ties…

*sometimes.  please do not interpret this as BO=sexy



This guy looked like he had showered, slept, and eaten.  So when he said he didn’t look good today, he either meant:

1) He is never attractive enough to be used in a photo project

2) He is the oh so common Swedish Metro Male who is about as high maintenance as a Valley Girl

3) He is a spy

4) He hates my face

And as this scenario is a comprehensive look into how I handle rejection, you can understand why job hunting is so difficult for me right now.


4 thoughts on “This morning I was rejected by a boy at a bus stop.

Add yours

  1. This is an interesting commentary on Stockholm men. Or maybe we have to find 10 more similar reactions to know if this is typical? We like to think it is anyhow!


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